I,The Sombong Girl(apparently).

" being the most sombong girl?-anyways,it's fun"-Navanita :)

26th March'10 @ 1400

It's been real a tiring week,even when I had only 4 days of classes since Monday was an off day due to cycle break(an off day before I started with my Internal Medicine subject!)Perhaps it wouldn't have been this exhausting if it wasn't for our super strict and hidden sarcasm doctor.She definitely has something against me.Not a day goes by without her picking on me for even a slightest reason..sigh...2 more weeks with her,gotta get through it.Nevertheless,having her as our practical classes' mentor is one thing my group has been looking forward.Well can;t blame her for acting that way when her previous mentor was the most digeruni Dr. in NNSMA!

Emergency cycle with anaesthesiologist,Dr.Pitchugin in the evenings.How does it feel like having to squeeze your brain/on the go around the clock from 9am till 4pm without lunch to feed your cells?That's what exactly happened yesterday..by the time I got back home,I was too drained out.I know I had to eat for I have been 'fasting' since morning but the feeling of hunger was supressed further.Had a bun,checked my mail and there I went,under the blanket till 8.30pm.After refreshing,a moment in fb with replying msg,keeping myself updated with the latest on TheStarOnline,at 11.30pm,I faced my books..topic for today:Differential diagnosis on abdominal pain,prescription list for my patient of the day and doses on hypertensive crisis drugs,I had to call the day off at 3.30am as my eyes were refusing to stay awake though I wanted to stay vigile till the morning.

For 2 days in a row,I had been getting up unconciously,turning off my alarm and dozed off.Luckily,I still got up at my usual 5.30am and hit the shower.The accumulated tiredness is taking a great toll on me.No,I'm not grumpy but out of I feel everything has been hitting back at me directly right on my face!!!Never ending thick books to flip through...hang on,Nita!!!

Besides all that the week has been good.Had a good chat with Ragu on sunday till 4am Malysian time,received 2 good messages via fb.One of it I have to mention it here,..Prakash messaged and informed me that his engagement will be in July once I'm back.His pre-engagement day will be officiated with family reunion and bbq which will be held in Teluk Intan*loving it!*..I don't think any other place will be ideal for him to intro his would be to The Family.I'm happy for you,cousin bro!!!

We will rock it this july!

I'm not a girl who wears a smile all the time.Though my threshold of turning into a red chilli face has increased(miraculously!),yet the onset is still considered very much alarming.I have no autonomic power on my emotions,so just bear with me,with an addition of a new title: the sombong girl.Thank you.

Okay,gotta leave to hospital in 30 minutes time and T.G.I.F (Thank God It's Friday!)

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~I Knew I Loved You before I Met You~

*sending my angel to look after you*

19th March'10 @ 2240

I KNEW I LOVED YOU BEFORE I MET YOU by Savage Garden

Hmm ohh,I will come

Maybe it's intuition

Somethings you just don't question

Like in your eyes,I see my future in an instant

And there it goes,I think I've found my best friend

I know that it might sound crazy

More than a little crazy

But I believe

I knew I loved you before I met You

I think I dreamed you into life

I knew I loved you before I met you

I have been waiting all my life

There's just no rhyme or reason

Only a sense of completion

And in your eyes,I see the missing pieces

I'm searching for,I think I've found my way home

I know that it might sound

more than a little crazy

But I believe

I knew I loved you before I met you

I think I dreamed you into life

I knew I loved you before I met you

I have been waiting all my life

Ooh hoo ooo,hoo ooo ooo ohh

A thousand angels dance around you

(Ooh hoo,hoo ooo hoo ooo hoo hoo hoo)

I am complete now that I have found you

I knew I loved you before I met you

I think I dreamed you into life

I knew I loved you before I met you

I have been waiting all my life

I knew I loved you before I met you

I think I dreamed you into life

I knew I loved you before I met you

I have been waiting all my life

I knew I loved you before I met you,I knew I loved you

(Ooh hoo ooo,hoo hoo ooo)

I knew I loved you before I met you,I knew I loved you

(Ooh hoo ooo,hoo hoo ooo)

I knew I loved you before I met you

(oh oh,ohh ohh,oh oh oh ay ay yea oh)

I knew I loved you before I met you,I knew I loved you

I knew I loved you before I

I'm back to my oldies (correction old is gold) collection.I can never live without music,lovely songs with incomparably beautifully written lyrics.Being a good listener makes a vast difference..only in silence you can actually hear and feel something~

I really miss the 90's hits.Current songs are just beyond my perception of hearing.I don't favour them as much I do my favourites.From the teen girl who had kept herself on par with latest hits,now I'm just lost with the latest music world especially with the many new faces of music makers.Heck,as long as I have my playlists playing my all time and everlasting favourites,I couldn't be bothered with the new tracks.

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~S.t.u.d.y M.o.d.e~

11th March'10@1410

45 minutes to go before my russian class with a text on investigations plan on a patient to retell.The text is running in my mind,well only started memorising after I was back from my 1st day of oncology class(lasted 30 mins) which will be officially starting tomorrow at 8 am with 'esophageal cancer' topic.Even before the advancement of 1st class,we are assigned for presentations with topics to choose-malignant melanoma,lung cancer,colorectal cancer,breast cancer,gastric cancer,liver cancer,pancreatic cancer and etc.Not sure when we will be asked to present them,I''m guessing most probably next week.I'm looking forward to being ushered into the surgery room to witness some bloody surgeries,as for tomorrow will be colorectal cancer's surgery.

The schedule for summer practicals has been released by MSA.Thank you to Kheng Huat for the updates.As I has calculated earlier,I can be back home the first week of July *yippeeeee*.Now that I have found few of my batchmates who will be going back by Thai,I immediately informed Dad to book my Thai ticket.*waiting for July to come but before that EXAMS!!!*.Anne is incharge for our get away plan in July,informed her about my return and both of us are so excited because the gang agreed and gave us positive feedbacks..it's definitely gonna be so exciting!!!And another 'get away'...when to fix it?*thinking really hard,I can't escape this year I know;p*

Today is pre-friday day..the week passed by very fast with only 4 working days and before I could realise June will be just around the corner!The many tomorrows have already passed by me,gotta SWITCH ON MY STUDY MODE and push the button real hard to prepare for all the exams.Too many things to be done,to be exact..not complaining but just puzzled how am I going to get everything done without any glitches.Nevertheless,I know I can do it if I maintain my momentum.Nothing comes easy,I realised that a very long time ago.Hardwork will definitely get paid later and it won;t go in vain.Efforts,efforts and efforts-that's what matters all the time!

p/s: don't get distracted till all your exams are over!'other things' CAN WAIT till your return to Ipoh~

Proud to be one.

9th March'10@0015

A very belated Happy Women's Day(8th March) to all the strong willed,beautiful (inner and outside),respectable,dedicated,pretty,attractive and in short,a toss for those who are proudly bearing the word: girl/lady/woman.Happy women's day ya'll!!!

It's pretty ironic to call yourself a young lady when you know there are lots more to be attained to achieve the true meaning of being a lady.

Nevertheless,I'm proud to be one:)Though I'm no longer a fan of Ms.Spears,few of her earlier hits managed to win my heart especially the one below:

I'm not a girl,not yet a woman-by Britney Spears.

I used to think

I had the answers to everything

But now I know

That life doesn't always

Go my way,yeah

Feels like I'm caught in the middle,

That's when I realise

*chorus*

I'm not a girl

Not yet a woman

All I need is time

A moment that is mine

While I'm in between

I'm not a girl

There is no need to protect me

It's time that I

Learn to face up to this on my own

I've seen so much more than you know now

So don't tell me to shut my eyes

*chorus*

I'm not a girl

But if you look at Me closely

You will see it in my eyes

This girl will always find

Her way

(I'm not a girl)

I'm not a girl

Don't tell me what to believe

(not yet a woman)

I'm just tryin' to find the woman in me,yeah

(All I need is time) all I need

(A moment that is mine) that's mine

While I'm in between

I'm not a girl

Not yet a woman

All I need is time(is all I need)

A moment that is mine

While I'm in between

I'm not a girl

Not yet a woman.

the ongoing battle between the heart and the brain's limbic system will never tone down till the absolute way out is found and this concludes this entry of mine for today.

now,it's time to sleep!!

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is wanting >24 hours/day!

*waiting for the right time to come*

3rd march'10@1715

This entry of mine definitely will sound like 'the most exhausted girl's entry' ever!!!I think I'm losing my stamina..no I hate that seriously!Then how do you call the syndrome(?) of feeling tired almost everyday and looking damn tired to others?Still,appetite is on,infact I've been quite a 'ferocious' eater for the past few days.I just felt like popping every single food into my mouth...I know this will make some people happy but guess I have to watch out what I'm eating,I still want to slip right into my prefects clothes of the 18 year old me!

I was feeling so bloody sleepy in russian class half an hour ago.Infact all of us were!I was just hoping Mdm.Tatyana will notice and let us go earlier,but it wasn't any earlier that 5 pm.:(WIth clinical pharmacology on the run,life is all back to PHARMACOLOGY with my favourite Mdm.Dugina.Interesting subject,as it has always been but to have a very high expectation on us on the very first day of class is definitely a bad idea!And I can't seem to be able to revise the previous days topics because it takes ages to remember everything so intactly..duh,how am I going to fit everything in my small cerebral cortex?*AN ADDITIONAL HEADACHE,NOW!*.

I know I should have been just gotten under my comfy blanket and have atleast 2 hours of nap but again,I know I've been looking at my blog from the corner of my eyes for the past few days,so here I am today.Missed writing something very very interesting;well can't blame me,into the usual 'latent period':p

Maybe I should get some sleep before I collapse to the ground,lol.

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a toss for.....

*SMILING?EMOTIONLESS?SAD?@LABILE MOOD?*

23rd February'10@2045

This is my post 1 week of exam blog.With the commencement of 10th semester,in a week I had psychiatry exam.Exactly one week right after my exam.Yeah,I got through excellently,more like my mark was given based on my performances in class and with an additional question(I've never been asked that question in any of my exams here!).Done with my 1st exam for the sem and currently into Infectious Diseases rotation which will be ending this saturday.

I was waiting anxiously for Friday(19th February'10) so that I could take a complete break for the next 4 days(which I did,3 days without books!).23rd February is a public holiday which marks for Men's Day.In real,looking back at history,formely this celebration was intended for those who had served the army and it was known as Red Army Day.Basically,23rd February is celebrated by giving gifts to all the adam's species in Russian Federation,Ukraine,Belarus.Officially now,it is called DEFENDER OF THE FATHERLAND DAY.And now,tomorrow,back to my usual routine..ermm,can I extend few more days of break?Going to bed when the dawn breaks,and waking up past noon,is certainly blissful!!!:p

Chinese New Year celebration was held yesterday at 3rd hostel.No performances like the previous years,everyone is certainly BUSY!There's no fun in just thanking and wishing "happy chinese new year' and walk away with food/just stay inside a room with a couple of friends.I kind of missed our 4th floor's spirit..I still remember 3 years ago in our 5th sem when the whole 4th floor's residence(atleast majority of us) sat on a mat spread on the floor and enjoyed the food,that's how it's supposed to be but sadly,it's not like that anymore,especially now with another 2 semesters left before we bid goodbye to each other.

Anyhows,the food was really tasty.Rumin sim gave me this large piece of fried chicken...*burp* thank you everyone:)

On sunday,for the very first time,i tasted yee sang which was prepared by yeow,kok meng,soo ching,rumin,kheng huat and shari.Tossing yee sang was thrilling but not when it falls on others hands!!Thank you,thank you..too bad the pix are still with Kok meng,can't upload them:(

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So they say it..Happy Valentine's Day!

*on this Valentine,for my valentine,I give You my heart*-I think this is a very cute pic :p

12th February'10@1600

"Nava,what's the plan for sunday?" Jeff questioned me to which I responded with a smile.Still the both funny groupmates of mine,who are apparently my walking partners from psychiatry hospital(every day!) continued asking "You know what's the day right?" This time I responded back saying "No,I don't" obviously with a smile,again.They didn't believe though saying "ah,you don;t know?" and burst out laughing! Jeff again "what you will be doing on sunday?" Me: "will be dating my psychiatry notes.That's the plan for Tuesday's exam!"...so here you go,the time of the year came again for us to show and spread love.Thanks to St.Valentine for making it an official day to celebrate the day of love,but,just the me asking again a very simple question:"I thought everyday is a Valentine's Day,no?"

10th Semester had been officiated with psychiatry exam cycle..yeap it has been a week,and next Tuesday will be my first exam for the semester.So still trying to get all the psychiatry terms into my mind.The first few days I found it very hard to get started with books after the extreme hibernation and idle me of 10 days of holidays.I was complaining "WHY ONLY 10 DAYS?".."I WANT A LONGER WINTER BREAK!!!".But now,I find psychiatry is interesting,too though not that much when it comes to patients,well will come to that point very soon...

Previous semester,Dr.Kitaieva was our mentor and for this semester,Dr.Ivan Borisovich took over and he will be our examiner.He's very good at commenting and explaining and the best thing about him is he himself being the 'patient' especially when he mimics and demonstrates gestures,physical appearance and every day situations of a psychic patients.Good job,Dr.

Last semester,the whole cycle was spent in our classroom wherelse this semester,we were exposed more to patients.2 days consequently (yesterday and today) we visited the female department.All of us had the fear (atleast the slightest) before we were even told to change our second pair of shoes and get ready to face the patients.

Yesterday was my very first time being in the department.I was on my guard,so did my groupmates.As the main door was unlocked to let us in,the very first female patient we say exerted the fear in all of till the end.She was in her green robe,with a continuous serious look,with subtly flexed face,looking very intensely at us.We walked pass the many patients wandering outside their wards and a few even came out from their rooms upon seeing the 'new doctors'.I was standing beside the couch seated by sarah,xiang yun and treasure,when we saw the lady in green was advancing her pace towards us with a manner to attack.My heart started to pound and when another patient(whom later was interviewed) approached us,she turned away and was back to her initial position standing behind the locked door.Phewww!!!

3 patients were interviewed.Everyone with 3rd auditory hallucinations.I wonder what the voices been telling them while they(the patients) were facing us.The very much anticipated abdalla became as quiet as a mouse upon seeing the patients.Though with delusions,agitation,tangentiality,flight of ideas which can annoy others,they still need the fullest care and support to get better because there's no way they can manage it/recover with only medications,or most of the time there;s no history of full recovery in psychiatry patients.Today,we had 2 patients with Alzheimer's Dementia and Vascular Dementia.2 different patients(totally).Impairement memory and intelligence are clearly visible when the clock could be drawn(to access visiospatial) but failure to point it at 3.40pm.Both patients couldn't even remember their children and spouses names.How saddening is that now right?Alzheimer;an unknown ethiology of progressive impairement of the brain's function can give a different outlook towards life to appreciate and be thankful for being the gifted ones once you're exposed to these type of situations.Still,no one can predict who will be the next victim of Alzheimer's as the age catches up.

On another note,on monday and tuesday,zakiah and I were followed by a young lad in his early 20s by the name Dima.From my observation,he is definitely a patient over there.His movements were rigid(like a robort),bright red eyes but well groomed and with a slow speech.Initially,abdalla became his first friend after I passed by him and went up upstairs.He followed abdalla and wanted to get to know the girls.Luckily,all of us were saved by Dr.Ivan Borisovich ushering us into the classroom.The next day,as I entered the department,he was waiting over there.He came so close that I started to get anxious.As the approach towards psychiatry patients are more 'gentle',I remained on my position and came a question "what's your name?" "Leena",I answered to which he replied "nice name"."On friday,can you come for a concert?" Me: "I can't,I have classes".Dima:"Okay,after class,you come". Me:"okay".I was just waiting to get out of his sight and quickly climbed up to my class.Later during break and again as zakiah and I were at the washroom,he appeared again asking zakiah "Is Leena in there?"..Came out,he asked me something which I couldn;t undertsand and I said "bye" and left.Now,isn't that a freaking good experience to have had an encounter with these patients?

To all those are reading this entry of mine: "Happy Valentine's Day to all of you".And remember,Valentine's Day is a day to show your gratitude,appreciation and love to the ones you kept very very close to your heart and carry them wherever you go:) Celebrate the day and if possible,make it an everyday event,and not only for a day(14th February each year!)

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