Good Bye,31st December'09~

*thank you 2009 for the great year,going to miss you*

31st december'09@0115

It's the last day of the year 2009!!!In less than 24 hours time,the whole world will be embarking into the year 2010.The 4 digits are pretty distinct and kind of stands out in my view.2010,don;t steal the limelight from your counterpart 2009,your time will come and now let me acknowledge 2009 for the last time before I turn my full attention to you,ok?:p

My internal medicine classes indeed were with Dr.Natalia Genedevna.Our very first day,she already had her favourite to pick on all the time which is me.Abdalla and Sara are her favourites(the angels) but Jeff was someone whom she'll tease all the time.The rest were just her additional distractants.By the end of 1st day of class,I(and the rest) had concluded her as being very sarcastic towards her.Despite that,she overloaded us with piles of homeworks.When her questions were not answered,she will assign them as your hometask and will ask about it the following day.So you get the brief idea right how it works?the number of times you fail to answer her,you'll get lesser hours of sleep on that day.She has a good memory..ain't a memory of an ant,ok?She remembers me very well "I took you for practical examination for exam,right?I remember you!"..well Dr."yes,you took me" but she doesn't give chance to me at all,even when i answered her.It's okay Dr,I'm having fun though having classes with you.

Do you believe in this...some people just have a fringgin' good luck and can always get away without being questioned!My flu didn;t disappear even after I took my meds.The irritated me turned to my last resort(as usual)-fight it with a good shower,no meds and adapt it by walking outdoors.And yes,it's better now,only my voice hasn;t back to normal completely.Despite all that,I researched on newly available drugs to be filled up in my prescription list of my patient(mine and abdalla's patient).And today,as usual with my name being the 1st on Dr.'s list,bombarded me with all her questions on my patient whom had unstable angina(crescendo variant)--suspected diagnosis by ME only!and his prescription list was empty and the answer that was given to me was " I thought we are supposed to be discussing about it today morning in the class to come up with the drugs for treatment!"..and he wasn't even asked one single damn question!!! How lucky can you get right?His prescription list wasn't even viewed.Praise the Lord,the drugs that I had prescribed was given greenlight except for morphine sulphate and Oxygen therapy.Phewwwwww....Now,my prescribed drugs can be found on his prescription list...it's okay,I did the job and you got an easy way out~

Being very hopeful here for tomorrow's late night outing with buddies.Usually we will be only on our 4th floor,pot luck,a movie,games and that's how we welcome our new year.A favourable temperature might take us to Minina Sq. to watch the launched fireworks and finally a dinner to commemorate the memories of 2009 and to anticipate 2010 with much enthusiasm.

I will be back with my first post for the year 2010 very soon;)

0150

Santa,are you there???

* I wish my santa will come and fly me away..*

25th December'09@1300

Merry Christmas,ya'll!!!it's the time of the year,the best also,I'd consider..I've always fancied all snowy white christmas ever since I was a kiddo(influenced completely by cartoons,tv shows..).Does santa clause really exist?Will he come down the chimney,drop gifts in the hanging socks/under the beautiful Christmas tree?I've always wondered...especially now here,should I start believing again in santa clause?Perhaps I should have opened the window wide so I could hear him coming yesterday right with his raindeers..."ho,ho,ho...jingle bells,jingle bells,jingle all the way...."It's still all snowy here but the temprature is spiking up and it's lil bit warmer,yesterday was -10*C which brought back smiles on our faces.

Yesterday was my last day of infectious diseases rotation.Got my zachut..our teacher was actually moved before letting us go..well she said "I'll try to take you all back next semester"..wow,were we that good or do we need further polishing up?*wink*.I like her actually,she's a dedicated and a hardworker compared to the other teachers.There was not a time we were dismissed before 1.30 pm during classes.I loathed one thing in that hospital,well the room which occupied us was really cold,seriously FREAKING cold!hated that though,other wise the rotation was interesting as infectious diseases are very common in medical practice.

After compensating my sleeping hours,went online and had a chat with vicks.Well she asked me

"what do you wish for if santa comes to you at this very moment?"

I replied : "I hope he will come and take me away to Malaysia in his raindeers" to which she replied "omg,that's so sweet"..

*in reality,I want more,but guess that wish is more than sufficent at this very minute!~"

Last tuesday was an unforgetful day for me.I boarded the bus to internal medicine lecture but I was stuck in a massive traffic.None of the vehicles were moving an inch!At that very time,I felt like getting behind the wheels and ramming into all the vehicles to make my way.It was already 2.55pm and lecture starts on time at 3pm!As I could only see very vividly outside the window,I got down the bus as the doors were opened,only to realise the bus hadn;t even reached the Balshaya Pakrovskaya stop..dang!I wasted no time,ran,cross the road and ran again till I reached the lecture hall at 3.05pm.I was gasping for my breath as entered the hall,lecture had started.I knew my face was all hyperemic(visible?).Didn't change into my white coat,took out my papers and started writing Dr.Panova's lectures on Upper and Lower GIT bleeding (II part)..During break of 10 minutes,I realised I only had missed the first 2 lines of the lecture which means I was fast enough to arrive for lecture!! Yet,I think that was the best exercise anyone could get especially in a freezing cold weather(-10*C or less?).I think I ran like more than 1 km but less than 2 km.And the outcome is : I'm down with flu and sore throat cos of the inhaled cold weather.Luckily,better now.

Next monday will be zachut for russian..and I still have a text"polyclicnic" to retell.I was prepared a month ago,but due to certain circumstances,I couldn't retell.Will get it done by monday and offcially monday too,will be starting with my remaining days of Internal Medicine rotation(for 5 days) in 5th hospital.Most likely we will be under Dr.Natalia Genedevna @ Britney.Anyone would do,doesn't really matter actually but as for now I'm happy because we don't have to travel all the way to 13th HOspital in Avtozavod.

0130

Winter- to like or to dislike?

*yesterday at 2pm: -15*..winter oh winter...*

*scenery outside hostel no.1*

*everything that you wanted on sis prema's baby shower day*

19th december'09@0300

Holla saturday dawn :) *me still not yawning*.The 3 hours of nap right after back from infectious diseases today is the reason why I'm still being a vampire at this hour.I waited eargerly,very much for friday to come,so it came and left me at a high speed.

Winter is FINALLY here,officially!!The temperature fluctuated and dropped drastically from less than 10*C to -29*C.Extreme cold season that you could ever imagine.It got 'warmer' the next following days: -28*C,-27*C and finally today was -15*C(thankfully!).I've always loved cold season when I was back in Malaysia.Even after I came here,I loved it and still love it and that's only if the temperature doesn;t fall below -15*C.I still can withstand the cold atmosphere provided there's NO caressing wind on my face!

Monday was a long day for me.I had to cover the scarf up till my nose for 2 main reasons:-to hinder myself from catching any unwanted viruses spread by the susceptible people especially in the bus and to prevent my cheeks from getting 'fatter' ...It's freaking cold that my ever senstive lacrimal sac was triggered and tears rolled down my cheeks involuntarily..arrghhh,I hate that..Eyelashes glued together by the snow flecks, fingers and toe numbness can remind you of paraphlegic/diabetic neuropathy patients...so that's the wonders of winter,if you want me to name a few.Still,I think I will be missing this weather after 1.5 years of my stay here.:( Just a request,please get warmer,I mean REAL warm soon perhaps 0*C will be just too perfect anf will bring the utmost joy to all of us here.By the way,for the russians,this is their normal winter,yeah NORMAL WINTER when it's -30*C or even lesser than that!!

Here's my personal note to you bloggie,sorry for abandoning you lately.I've been really busy.I've got so many things to do at a time.I thought of finishing one exam this month but the deans as usual called off all our plans,so I'm left with paediatrics(3 semesters work) on the 22nd January and Epidemiology on the 28th january.6 days apart for 2 exams,so let's do it!!!

I had missed 2 important events for the past 2 weeks.First was Sis Prema's baby shower ceremony in Cheras.It was totally grand as everyone(maternal side) was anticipating the lil cutie very much,I can say that again because he will be grandpa's 1st great grandchild:)

secondly,daddy's surprise birthday party(post birthday) which was held at home in ipoh.Ragu,Mum and my aunties planned it,invited close relatives and dad had his 2nd birthday cake last sunday.I was overjoyed while webcaming as everyone was there except for my elder brothers.I know dad enjoyed the day very much when previously dad complained to me saying "how could your mother forget my age?She lighted extra 1 candle on my cake!"..Mum:"Why is it a big crime now?" Me from here :"Daddy,you are still young to us and you don;t look as if you're 50++" *wink*and dad's reply : Yes ma,AFTER ALL 50++"...I miss being there and witnessing all the precious moments with them.

Okay then,I'm done for today.Nites.

0330

9th rotation:Infectious Diseases.

12th December'09@1140

I've never been this exhausted ever in my 5 years here,but yesterday was an exception.The week ended with a gush of tiredness,which made me so worn out at the end of the day.What a Friday was yesterday!!!

All the tiredness of the week exerted 'the cumulative effect' yesterday.Firstly,blame it on the 6 days of quarantine which threw my plans off the track.BECAUSE OF THE QUARANTINE,we have to replace classes of epidemiology with the consent of the professor.Actually I don;t mind replacing all the classes,and THAT'S ONLY IF she's in charge.Her extra notes besides the usual read outs of lectures by other teachers,makes her lectures interesting for me.

As for that,Group 531E,F and D were only asked to replace 2 days of lectures.With new rotation on infectious diseases from 9 ok,latest 9.30am to 2pm,we had to leave to minina for epidemiology at 3.30pm till 5.30pm.On wednesday,the class ended at 5pm.By the time I reached to hostel,it was already 7pm...that's my friday!!! I came back,cooked my staple food,maggie + egg,had my so called dinner whilst surfing the web and by 8pm i was all set to zzzzz...

and today,I woke up at 9am! A complete 13 hours of sleep.Did some room cleaning,had breakfast and I think I will be going back to my bed very soon..,perhaps after a couple of hours because the tiredness in me is not weaning off any time..duh!that's not a good sign when exams are just around the corner..errmmm...

Infectious diseases rotation.Professor is really good till I had to scribble her lectures and rewrite them back home if I were to copy each and every word of hers.So,thanks to my E66,whenever she goes out,one of my groupmates will be guarding the door,and I will carry out my mission to snap her lecture materials for future reference...

Personally i think,they should have just combined epidemiology + infectious diseases cycles together.Why?Mostly because the topics of infectious diseases are related!(in fact the exam questions for both of the subjects are the same!)...so,they should have just compressed both cycles at a time,but Russians...what's more there to be said?

In class,practically we just discuss whatever that's been given in lectures and maybe add one or two new informations from our tutorial classes' teacher..pretty much less hectic cycle for me.So now I have an ample of time for the other subjects which I had given break for few days due to my busy days...

Okay,back to week,eh..maybe after a few hours of nap?will think about it...~

1205

8th Rotation: CARDIO SURGERY.

4th December'09 @ 2234

At last,here I am,sitting on my bed,leaning against the wall,me DELL on my lap,playlist with my favourite tracks and FINALLY this is my first post for the month december which will be officiated by my most waited and looked forward rotation: Cardio Surgery.To be honest,in my time table it was written surgical diseases and I cared less actually,thinking my group,just like any other years will be travelling all the way to Ilinskaya and for the 3rd time(maybe?) will be stuck at the Urology department but hey,I gasped and said "REALLY?WE HAVE CARDIO rotation?cool...yeay!!! "

This cardio rotation is from 2nd dec till 8th dec *sighing here*..why so short of time for a most vital organ,am I right?Can we retort and go on demonstration here so that they will abolish subjects like philosophy and hygiene and make use of those times with Cardiology?*how I wish*...You can excuse me here for being extra sensitive when it comes to the heart,I can't be helped here,addicted completely with these complex organ for years and I know for sure which speciality I will be choosing once I'm done with my M.D.I've never changed my mind and that's what I want.The strong affection of mine towards the heart can never be separable...I'm just totally in love with the heart as an organ!:)

1st day of rotation:prepared for class on anatomy and physiology of the heart as we were told by the previous groups.We will be under a nepalese doctor.Zakiah was all agitated wherelse I was more relaxed and cool that I even took a pic of myself at my study table(he-he).Zakiah: "takutla,cikgu nepal tu sarcastic tau"..Me :chill la,it's the heart..I'm al excited..see look at me!!"..Zakiah : "yela,you suka the heart".. me :"yeappppp" and continued " after having all the strict teachers,tak kisah dah,let's see what happens today!"

Reached cardiac centre on time but as we entered Dr.Krishna's(if I'm correct)cabin,wani,syahrul,fil and sara were already in their positions.Names were already written on a piece of paper and began ice breaking ceremony..then first thing he said "come before 9 am!"..At one glance,looking at his fair skin,petite and thin physique,very neatly combed hair,and spectacle on his nose,you'll think he's just like any other doctors(go easy on you) but I know,you cannot fool around with him. I just knew it even before I saw him..why?Because you're talking about someone in the field of CARDIOLOGY!They just have this 'arrogance that attracts others and it will actually inspire you to move towards your goal!'+ with this unique aura of being a CARDIOLOGIST/CARDIOSURGEON.If it was any other doctors with full of arrogance,by now I would have critised them..I know I'm being so unfair but CARDIOLOGY IS THE SPECIAL FIELD AMONG THE REST.

Towards the end of the class of our first day,I was brain dead which happened the following day and even today..yeay finally it's friday!This is the most stressful rotation that we have ever had in our 5 years here especially when it comes to surgey cycle.We are only given 30 minutes of break and class will end sharp at 1.30pm.One by one will be called to answer his questions without referring to any notes and he will catch you and hit you back directly on the face when you failed to answer him,just like,he'll go "see,you didn't read the books,if you had read,you would have known the answer!" and that made my blood pressure spike up because I simply anti anyone who says that to ME!and yeah it changed our opinions on him.2nd part before the break,we visited the patients,I was the first to take a full history complemented with physical examination on a patient with congenital bicuspid aortic valve.It was ok but as usual,the language is the barrier..and as for the practical part,I did well (yes!) ..later,we moved on another patient..and our final task during the 30 minutes break was to make a short case report for discussion before we will be dismissed.In addition to that,we had to make an article containing >8 pages of information related to our given topics.Now you see..this dr is hyperactive and strict despite his stature just like they say "kecil-kecil cili padi" or "diam-diam ubi berisi"

2nd day : the nepalese dr. who's doing his second year residency here,continued with his skills to drain all our energy with his questionnaires.He's very good in trapping you...he'll listen carefully without any facial expressions or gestures,then to recheck whether you are being attentive,he'll ask you to repeat what your colleagues had just said.When you fail to repeat,he'll give you his wisdowm words " always respect to listen"..He lets you learn your mistake without pointing at it for example,he'll listen to " pumonary veins drain to right atrium ,right?" and you'll go "yes,it is" *in the midst of answering his questions/during presentation* and then he'll just smile and ask another person to alert the 1st one..see?He showed us echocardiography of valvular heart diseases and pcitures ofpulmonary amboli that was removed.He even took out from the refrigerator and showed us all the 'pathological artifacts' which they had removed during the heart surgeries. same routine continued yesterday :presentation-patients-ad hoc case reports-discussions.The number of scowled faces increased today.

3rd day : My presentation today based on atrioventricular canals.It was 10 pages long.I prepared well (I think) that I didn't had much time left for my today's topic : Ischemic heard disease.IHD is not something that will leave my mind easily after the strenuous cycle and exam of internal medicine,so I was confident that I could answer him if any questions were to be directed to me.After patients,break and dicussions.We watched clips on coronary angiography,how is it done,and it's indications.He was less uptight today,was making jokes and made us laugh when he still bombarded us.Words of wisdom for the day" where there;s a will,there's a way" .."learning is a continuous process".."listen to your patients"..Finallt when we were done for the day ,he sat back,on his chair and asked us to give comments on his classes,both positive and negative ones.One thing all of us had in common: WE REALLY GAINED ALOT IN THESE 3 DAYS.(like what jeff said :it's not even the 3rd day,I'm already so exhausted!)..so when it comes to my turn,I said:

positive remark: This is the best surgery cycle ever.

suggestion: can we atleast watch 1 open heart surgery?(to which he said we might be*fingers crossed,hopefully!* on mon /tues)

negative remark: *looked at one by one * and I said .." we don't like when you say WE DIDN'T READ THE BOOKS!" (to which he smiled)

His response to all of our comments :ACCEPTED!

conclusion: He's the best dr.anyone could ever get here in russia.If only all the teachers are like him we will be great medical students and inevitably a competent one.*Believe it,we said that to him* Fil even said : Wish we could have met you earlier.Just like I had said,his arrogance didn;t make us feel alienated/angry towards him..it's just that your ego is challenged when he smirks at you.He's very sharp though.Definitely,he was the all studious type during his med school years.His knowledge on CARDIO is adorable and it's the way he explains them without any hesitations when you're in doubt.Maybe his fluency in english despite his ascent makes me write all this admirable characters his in CARDIO.

As for me,I wasn't under a great amount of stress just like how the rest had mentioned.All that I see is me myself being like him one day.I want to be some one like that.This doctor is another inspiration of mine which has started ever since wednesday.

We can't thank you enough you,sir though you made most of our hearts palpitate in your classes.I'm very proud to say,I'm his last victim which he had picked on(the least number of times,I would say)..and I;m very happy for that.

Just like Dr.Krishna had said "BEING A DOCTOR IS NOT AN EASY STEP"..and now,who will deny that?I know,I still have a long way to go in this path of CARDIOLOGY.

Once again,Thank you DR.

2339

A tribute to November~

* Kevin,we the fans miss you loads,waiting for your return*

* courtesy of Nico:few pix of THE BSB in Frankfurt*

* miss seeing Kevin on stage with them:(*

*their ever massive dance for larger than life*

30th November'09@2022

Finally,one more day left for my H1N1 quarantine to end.My alarm rang at 7 today,thinking of going for jogging but it was a blunder because it was still dark and the pathways are all wet and before I could realise,it was drizzling + snowing..(ha-ha),when I'm too ambitious,this is what happens..so,I happily slipped back into my covers and woke up at 9am.

A normal routine of mine,having breakfast while checking mails,I got a very lengthy mail from my 1st e-pal(electronic pal,that's how i address kitty and the rest) @ BSB friend from Florida,USA.It's been 8 years since we got to know each other.We used to exhange mails often,more constantly unlike now..I'm a bad friend even she said it's her who's been abandoning me.Her sincere wishes for my belated birthday,updates on herself and The Boys were the main substances of her mail.Thank you buddy:) I appreciate that very much for you still remembering me.To redeem myself,I sent her BSB's This is Us Tour Concert photos in Frankfurt,uploaded in fb by my other BSB pal,Nico from Romania(yeah,she's the lucky one who attended their gig!).And she got for me MORE THAN 60 PIX OF THEIR GIG! TRULY AWESOME,LOVE YA BUDDY:)

Speaking the truth,I miss communicating with my BSB pals as often as I did last time.I've had so many of them,almost from all over the world(strictly,only girls though!!),from USA,Canada,India,Romania,Korea,Spain.Though when I send forwarded e-mails once in a blue moon,I'll still include them in mailing list,but it's sheerly different how things were last time.Now,only few are very actively communicating with me-Nico,Neha,Valen and Kitty.Even now,we still express our gratitude to backstreet.net(the best(est) web created for the latest BSB news.The site has served us without fail in updating us the best of BSB news and needless to say,our rivals N*Sync fans used to lash back at us for they always wanted to belittle BSB at our own site!! NOw,we(fans from all over the world) will collaborate together and send back our 'missiles' of words....it was fun though,hitting back N*Sync fans who never admits the former N*sync's was a wanna be of BSB.And all that happened when I was sweet 16 and in return,we fostered a good friendship over the million miles parting us based on our love to BSB and their music.Can I get back those times?

All i can do now is only by keeping in touch with my BSB pals and this is it-no matter what/who I have become in future,I'll still keep my pals posted and the love for BSB's music is certainly won't worn out with time,at least not for me.KTBPA and forever! Fan for life!

My favourite song for this week*back to back* addiction:

"WHAT MAKES YOU DIFFERENT(MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL)"-by THE BACKSTREET BOYS (from the album,Black and Blue,2001,Jive records)

You don't run with the crowd

You go your way

You don't play after day

You light up my day

Got your own kind of style

That sets you apart

Baby that;s why

You capture my heart

I know sometimes you feel

Like you don't fit in

But the world doesn't know

What You have within

When I look at you

I see something rare

A rose that can grow anywhere(grow anywhere)

And there's no one I know

That can compare

What makes you different

Makes you beautiful

What's there inside you

Shines through to me

In your eyes I see

All the love I'll ever need(you're all I need,oh girl,girl)

What makes you different

Makes you beautiful to me(yeah)

You've got something so real

Touched me so deep(touched me so deep)

See material things

Don't matter to me

So come as you are

You've got nothing to prove

You won me with all that you do

And I wanna take this chance and

say to you

What makes you different

Makes you beautiful

What's there inside you

Shines through to me

In your eyes I see

All the love I'll ever need(you're all I need,oh girl,girl)

What makes you different

Makes you beautiful to me

You don't know(you don;t know)

How you've touched my life(my life)

Oh there's so many ways

I just can't describe(so many)

you taught me what love is supposed to be

It's all the little things that makes you so beautiful to me(so beautiful,oh)

What makes you different

makes you beautiful

what there's inside you

Shines through to me(shines)

In your eyes I see

All the love I'll ever need(you're all I need,oh girl)

What makes you different

makes you beautiful to me

Everything in you is beautiful(so beautiful)

Love,you give shines right through me(shines to me)

Everything in you is beautiful(ohh)

Beautiful to me(to me)

Navanita Satyanarayanan likes this.

2100

7th rotation.Friday Night.A Chat.

20th November'09@2320

"Life should be like a game of cards,

You make a mistake,

Then fold the deck and start over

It should be just like drivin in your car

Get lost and your navigation system

Gets you closer

But there ain't no handbook

You're on your own

Got no instructions

when it comes to love

Cuz once you done something

You can't undone...."

the lyrics which had captured my heart and mind for the past few hours,been replaying "IF I KNEW THEN" by THE BSB...I think I love the new album very much,already fell head over heels with all the songs.Their main genre from pop music has been imporvised now with R&B and a slight tinge of rock,and I think I love it..guess,from my previous favourites,:Straight through my heart,If I knew then,Masquerade,I'm adding This is Us,Undone and actually the rest of the compilations on the new album on my favourite list:)I'll fall in love over and over again with any BSB albums,so this is the typical me..addicted to the hiatus of infinity when it comes to their music and songs;)

My prayers was answered today..and like I had said before,Group 531E is the schematic group ever...we got Professor for epidemiology cycle when previous groups predicted we will be getting a less 'wanted' mentor.But I told them off "Group 531E,you'll never know,we might get the prof!" and it happened.Man,that woman is just so energetic and full of spirit when delievering lectures.With a certain degree of merciness in her,she did let us have break in between,2 times.We started at 9 am till 2pm..lecture,lecture and lecture..,she;s really good.All the facts were like glued in her brain forever and seems like she has no difficulty in coughing them out....wonder how I'll get all the statistical values inside my head.And this weekend,I'll be buried under my epidemio books.How can i not right?When prof said "being an epidemiologist,our main task is to control" which means each day my classes will be started off with giving small tests on us.Epidemio,let's enjoy it under prof's guidance:)

I've been thinking about this for sometime.Why do people love to be loud all the time?Why can;t their damn brain digest the idea that being loud all the time doesn't prove you right..it only irks people more,yeah more and more towards you.There's another flaw in that damn brain that thinks highly of him/herself "I'm the best and ONLY my opinion matters in a crowd!"I;m so disgusted with that...and there;s another variety of human which I had seen,the one who like to boss around but when loneliness creeps in,the person becomes 'I just follow what you say!'. how do you define these kind of creatures?You can;t manipulate me ever,mind you! You;re no different from the ones who irked you even at the sight of looking at them,last time.Hell with it...these kind of living beings shouldn't be entertained - a wiser thought of a 24 years old.

Ragu will be off to Ipoh tomorrow afternoon for a month of break.Finally,he;s on his sem break after his exams.He caught me today and I;ve been chatting with him for the past 1 hour.He and his juicy stories in USM.I'm laughing my head off here...okay bro,I can see the maturity in you.You're more open to me now,well that makes us even more closer now.I'm suprised at myself cos I'm able to open up to you too!I love the new you,the new you who's always there to listen to whatever I have to say*hugs*.You're the best bro in the whole world!I'm sure we have loads to share once I'm back next year for holidays.You'll be fine and do simply awesome in all the things you venture in.Happy holidays to you,enjoy your stay alone at home with mum and dad! I love you,thammudu(younger bro in telugu).*wink*

2340

This is Me:)

*wee..it's just so sceneric out here..love it!*

*531E & 531D in trauma classroom..the tv which had served us truthfully*

19th November'09@2315

BSB's latest tracks have been playing on my playlist for the past an hour.I'm in a great mood.Smiling all the way reading messages sent to me in facebook.Pre new rotations' break time.Tomorrow,my 7th rotation will commence: Epidemiology.No difference there,I still have to get up at 5.30am and leave my hostel at 8am to catch the buses.The only one thing i'm looking forward upon hearing is,getting a good and dedicated tutor for our practical classes.I hope I won't be getting group B's mentor.*I'm crossing my fingers here*.So new rotation,let's hope for a bright day tomorrow..kicking off the cycle with lecture tomorrow!:)

Traumatology,on a brighter side,I'm very positive that Dr.Malishev is very good when it comes to briefing and explaining regarding ortho and trauma.This rotation was considered the most relaxing cycle-->watching med clips on surgeries in class,theoretical classes for about an hour and at 12 well latest maybe 12.30pm,you're free from the hospital.But,I'm happy for what I had done during my trauma cycle despite the many comments saying "another chill" cycle.Dr.Malishev wished us luck and even said"see you all next year for orthopedics".*Definitely,Dr.*

It re-snowed again yesterday and even today.Though all you can see is white carpet welcoming you in the morning,the weather isn't cold.It'll be fine as long as there;s no snow storm/sunlight/wind.Just like today,it's 0*C today..I'm so in love with the weather.I won;t mind/ditch if the weather stays like this forever..bring it on!Right after we got our zachut/signature at the end of our trauma rotation,my groupmates and I (without sara) went to one of the best spots in Nizhny Novogorod to snap few shots.We have always looked out the window on 3rd floor and admiringly said" the scenery is simply breathtaking,isn't it?".hence,today we made our footsteps to the spot!:)

When July 2010 comes next year,I want to make sure that I'm done with all my exams,my luggages are packed and the next day,I want to fly back to Malaysia.I don't want to extend my another 2 weeks here for practicals because this year 5th years are obligated to do our ambulance and polyclinic here.Few of us have started and already finish their practicals on ambulance which totals 72 hours.While on the bus to see Dr.Lydia at Minina,and again,Wani and I were stalked by a Russian man in his 50s.*sigh*.We just gave him our smile and he started talking to us non-stop till we reached Minina.I wasn't interested in talking to him as I smelled alcohol odour in his breath,yet he was a stabil man.He persisted us to be his guests and told us he has 2 sons..etc..*oldman,I'm not interestedla..* I so wanted to tell him but just couldn;t be bothered.He started off the conversation saying" look at these 2 pretty girls" and he never stopped after that.He was very keen on taking us to his house in Minina but Syahrul managed to sent us off and joined us later after he followed the old man to his house!The old man reminded Syahrul to take us to his house next time since syahrul knows his house now!

I know Asians are the 'celebrities' in European countries,well here yes..everyday the Russians will be looking at you as if you're from a different planet.Oh c'mon Russians,get used to being around foreigners,will you?The old man even said,we are very small sized and started comparing his fist with us!Since wani's fist is XS in size,she got bullied the most!It was a pretty much a scene once he started talking to us on the bus that the other passengers were turning their heads and looking at us!As if the 'limelight' we were thrown into wasn't enough,suddenly he exlaimed while looking at me "oh,look at her beautiful eyes..what colour are they?Black or dark brown?"..his doubt was confirmed by another medical russian student who actually helped us all the while we were being bullied by the old man!Mucho Gracias lady!

I was just very happy to get away from him and never looked back once Syahrul became our(Wani and mine) scapegoat! (ha-ha)

2350

6th rotation:Orthopedics & Trauma

*scenery from the 3rd floor of the hospital*

*splints used for immobilisation*

12th November @ 0735

Arigato Gozaimas(good morning in Japanese:)),bloggie.This is my very first blog post early in the morning just before I leave to the trauma hospital:)

To nascent with,I'm a bit overzealous here because tomorrow I'll be having a day off..actually only the girls will be having break after a short and 'ad hoc' notice was out yesterday from the deans.The boys(all of them!) have to get vaccinated against rubella infections due to the increasing number of male students being affected by the rubrovirus.It all started 2 months ago when one of our coursemates were diagnosed with rubella infections.But lately,it just seems the boys are having rashes on their bodies,fever.Therefore,boys get ready to be vaccinated tomorrow and stop infecting the others,okay?lol..and yeah,thanks to all of you for the 'unofficial' off day:)

Orthopedics and Trauma- today will be my 3rd day of tutorial.1st day,since there wasn't any classrooms left to inhabit us,we only had a very short ice-breaking session with the traumatologist and by 10.30am we were free.So officially,2nd day we started our lesson with watching a recorded service done by the Red Cross Association in Sudan, mainly contibuted by the Australian,Sweden,Kenyan Medical Professionals.

0745

* to be continued*

12th November'09@2335

*continuation*

here's the next part of my post which I was supposed to post it earlier in the morning!Back to square one maybe?maybe not,let's get back to the movie that I had watched on war surgery.As i was watching the medical clip,I was thanking God for how lucky I am/how fortunate my life is.Looking at the victims,waiting for hours under the imminent sunlight for the arrival of the helicopter to fly them to any nearby hospitals.I remembered how we the lucky ones will turn so impatient and grumpy in clinics/hospitals when we are attended 5 minutes late.But these victims were just greatful for the medical aid being provided to them that they actually co-operate with the surgeons and physicians.Perhaps they had undergone too many traumatic incidents in their lifes that even a little kid didn't utter/let go of a shrill cry when treated.In short,the victims of the 3rd world country make the most out of whatever they could get.After all,the war has to go on in order for them to exist right?

After the movie,we had a brief discussion on triage and medical management regarding war surgery and later we were dismissed with hometasks on bleeding and antishock treatment.

today(12th november):started again our class with a recorded movie on amputations,graftings,fasciotomy,..and we got the idea that each class of ours will be officiated by a movie before discussions on hometasks.It wasn't exactly a movie which you will anticipate at 9.30am.Who would,please raise your hands:

description of the movie:

location: Operation room(OR)

objectives: amputations

fasciotomy

skin grafting/plasty

additional comments: eerie feeling (just like when you watch the movie SAW)

totally gross(looking at the wounds after explosions)

man= lifeless object(in skin grafting: it just looks like using a peeler/a grater for carrots,using of mini chain like saw in breaking the bones,screws,spanars to tighten the screws...)

I'm not a phobic when it comes to seeing blood/a pool of blood.I can always get away with it as long as the patient is unconcious.Whilst watching the movie,many couldn't watch the surgeries performed in silence:one can actually feel the sensation of being grafted on their own thigh for a skin plasty,the oozing blood (fluid like hematoma) can regurgitate your food upward ,later outward.So the best way to watch surgeries is to be in empty stomach,treat the patient as an innate object,be emotionless with the only motive:PRIMUM NON NOCERE (first,do no harm)@ SAVE LIFES FIRST!

Surgery is something I've always fascinated.I'll just get drawn to them what more if it conceerns about the cardio.I have a dream to watch a open heart surgery (live!) in Russia before I graduate,hopefully my dream will come true very soon;) oh did I tell you that in my 3rd year,my right hand was just above THE HEART of a patient when I lifted his left lung while aiding a surgeon.I can still,even at this very minute,feel how his heart was beating to sustain its function.That was the most exciting and the best(est) experience which I had throughout my surgery rotations.

On the other hand,now all the girls are also advised to go for rubella vaccination for prophylaxis.

Since I'm done with rewriting my Internal Lecture,and now I'm free to date with my DELL for a movie before I get myself under the blanket.This is the best weekend too,why?'Cos it's a 3 days weekend..HAPPY VACCINATION DAY people!:)

0005

Back into action.

* I managed to take a snap on this rare plant on my way back from psychiatry hosp..what plant/flower is it anyway?*

10th November'09@0000

Good bye Psychiatry and it's time for Orthopedics and Traumatology rotation tomorrow!Dr.Irina Ivanovna Kitaeva delievered our last lecture today after glaring at us upon our answers on "we had copied this materials on our 1st lecture!"..So she continued on theory on emotions and after 1 hour,she left us with the best Psychotherapist in Nizhny Novgorod(well that's what she said)..he's a man in his 50s,good stature and with spectacles.Okay,so you see came about 10 patients(post neurotic patients whoa re under his therapy).They sat on the front rows,and the therapy started with him turning on his radio,asking all of us to close our eyes,relax and follow his commands..okay here you go,I,as usual cannot sit still and yes,I wasn't under his 'hypnotism' but at that very moment lava sms-ed,so I was busy replying that I was wide awake throughout his 30 minutes +++ psychotherapy..well not only me who wasn;t interested but few of us were fidgetting too,* (ha-ha) fil,i saw you completing your summary on russian text!*Moreover all his commands were in Russian,so that was a big turn off for me.As for the enthusiastics,few of them actually ALMOST drifted to sleep!!!

Allright,I know I slacked right after my tb and internal exams..slacked in sense of I wasn;t being very disciplined though I'm still following rules imposed on me by myself.So this is it..freedom and kidding around stops today,gosh..it's already 10th November'09 and I still have lots to accomplish..what happened to all your 'doctor's recommendations?'..okay,since everything is back to its place now,I shouldn;t delay things anymore.I can;t stick to my words without a proper mechanism to control me.Finally,I managed to divide my time and like I had determined before returning to Russian Fed,"it's less than 2 years to go,and I'm going to make sure that I turn out to be a competent one..I will!'I'm going to work for it and any other distractions will not be entertained!*

0025

Transition Period.

6th November'09@2343

1st Transition Period.

-related to my psychiatry rotation.My last tutorial class was today with Dr.Irina Ivanovna Kitaeva.We love her..yes though she makes us sit in that freaking cold classroom for hours during our discussions.I enjoyed my classes with her especially the boys..on a special note,Abdalla,yes the one who loves to ask questions in return before the psychiatrist could ask him!He just asks lots and lots of questions,at times it's acceptable but most of the times you'll go.."abdalla...." because of his too inquisitive act will prolong the time and soon you'll be seeing us gritting our teeths and clutching our fists to box him!However,his questions do make sense,particularly the ones we tend to forget to enquire further explanation.On 1st day of tutorial,we learned on the introductory topic on psychiatry and guess what he asked towards the end?"Dr,how would you diagnose a patient from post traumatic accidents?" Dr: 1st looked at him.Secondly answered"We call that situation chronic/acute post traumatic stress disorder..and we will be discussing about it the next few days!"

-basically,she's an associate professor with a wide knowledge on her field.I'm drawn to the way she will give an example on our daily discussion on certain topics.And each and every example related to her life and her profession,mainly her patients.This semester,we are more exposed on how to interview the psychotic patients,watch interviews and finally like today,we watched "Beautiful Mind" in class as the movie is enclosed with concepts of visual hallucinations,delusions,social phobia,etc.I regeretted for not watching the movie completely previously on my own for I remember I got bored after 30minutes I played the movie.Interesting movie indeed,maybe I shouldn't make an early remark while watching any movies in first 30 minutes!

-Before the start of my psychiatry rotation,I said I wanted to learn and get into certain persons' heads just to know how and what they are thinking right?I think i did get near to my objective,at least now I can differentiate schizoid,schizotypal,paranoid,histrionic(just to name a few) personality disorders.It's interesting to know how you can manipulate someone(patient) to get their life story out of them in diagnosing their illness.Alas,I don;t know how I will be reacting next semester when I were to approach the patients on my own...now bear in mind please,psychotics are entirely different from the ones one see in medical departments!*perhaps,it won't be that bad,Nita..still errr....* But what's vital here in curing these patients ,I think is to provide a good support,love and psychotherapy aid with a great compliance from patients.

2nd Transition Period.

-this is totally revolves around my besties.2 days ago,Subha posted her shout out in fb" Love is in the air"..and yes she received many comments including from me.Though she denied saying it's meant for everyone out there but I as usual,rekindled her and refuse to believe(ha-ha).Later on,in my nap,I dreamt of Lava getting hitched/engaged..now this is the best one,don't you agree with me?I got so excited that before I went to bed today at 3 am,I just had the gut to post it on my fb as my shout out and Miss Lavania became the overnight fame with the total of 71 comments on my post from my besties!!! Everyone seems just too excited,just like me,waiting for her big day to arrive!yeay...

-From the little school girls,we had grown up to young ladies now,we can see the many changes which has come our way.Well,I can see what I had gone through over the years.I know what I want in my life though.When my besties(3 of them now are officially already TAKEN) are planning and enjoying their new moments in life,few of us including me here,still remaining so composed..and why is that so?" Got calon ready ke?"--the usual question being asked and the one and only safe and most appropriate answer of mine for now will be -- Just a smile,which will leave the many questions in peoples minds.Well,hold on to current episode,the right time will come ;)And yeah,I remember once me,shalu and aud said we will go hunting from north to south in order to find Mr.Right for ourselves.Now,isn't that funny?Whichever way life may take us,the only wish/hope I have for my girls "whichever path life may lead us in future,the chain of friendship should never be broken,even in the presence of a new person in our lifes..our friendship is meant to be forever and we are born to be friends till the end" .

p/s:by the way according to my psychiatric mentor,"LOVE IS A PROCESS"-- quote of the day,maybe?

Love you girls and subha,anne and lava---> good luck and all the best girls,make sure to be the best and definitely a sincere and a trustworthy one to your another half.

Miss you all loads.

*a big bear hug to all of you dearies!*

0030

Talentime*thumbs up*

3rd November'09@2308

Unlike the previous years,4th November has been officially elected for a public holiday in Russian Federation to commemorate after Russian Revolution Day.The real significance behind the day off tomorrow,I'm yet to find out,because even the Drs are unsure about it..then again,what matters is I have a day off tomorrow! Yeay!

3rd November'09-everything around me seems to be very beautiful today.It's just the atmosphere that surrounding me,I suppose.Love it.The temperature is -2*C today,yeap,winter is here people!Be prepared for the snow balls being thrown at you,the heavy thuds on your back due to the slippery roads,the snow storm hitting directly on your faces and what more you needed right?The small park right infornt of Gorkova Sq. is illuminated with lights and the scenery simply calms yourselves down even at 5.30pm (it looks as if 10pm in Malaysia).I was drifting away looking out of the window of the bus after my Internal Medicine Lecture had ended.The white snow makes everything so white and pure..I love this feeling during the year before the temperature fluctuates more lower.

After refreshing myself with a good shower,I made myself cucur and as for dessert,butter and peanut cookies from home,I nestled down confortably on my bed.Clutching my red heart colour small pillow,I started watching our very own,Malaysian made 'Talentime'.Thanks to Soo Ching for passing me the fabulous movie.Since I was all alone in my room,I just felt all good without any interference.I just wanted to be alone and spend time for myself after quite sometime when the previous 3 weeks were snatched away for entertaining others.

Now that I'm done with watching this movie "Talentime",I knew Malaysia has certainly has lost a very TALENTED scriptwriter,director,writer and more importantly a true Malaysian : the late Yasmin Ahmad.I never knew about her till I heard her demise in 25th July 2009 due to stroke and brain edema.I knew she had directed a number of super hit movies better to say "the true Malaysian essence filled movies" but I didn;t take the effort to watch them.All the heart touching Petronas Advertisments which provokes the 1Malaysia and multicultural society during festive seasons were all because of her.If there was one Malaysian with a true spirit of 'No races,Just Malaysians-- it just got to be her.*you will always stay in our memories and live in all your movies,Ma'am..good job in direction,will there ever be another Yasmin like you?May you rest R.I.P*..and now I feel the urge to watch her previous hit movies such as Sepet,Rabun and others.

Talentime...2 thumbs up for that greta movie.If only everyone sees the heart across the culture and skin colour,I believe the world will be a better place to live in.The simplicity of the movie casting a couple of new faces,Jacklyn Victor,Ida Nerina,Harith,Mahesh,Pamelo Chong will make a difference and appreciated by those who loves Malaysia as one community without races.Love,despair,hatredness,jealousy,hope,grieve,friendship are the main touch ups which made the movie simply superb.I'm simply contented because I spent the other half of my day watching this 'cun' movie on my own:)I enjoyed it and yeap,it's my latest favourite after P.S. I LOVE YOU.*damn,I still can;t forget his irish looking green mesmerising eyes*

I know another purely based Malaysian movie will be out soon or is it already released? entitled ESTET(estate)..I;m very keen to watch it.Anyone has any nice feedbacks on it?Please leave a message here.Thank you and happy public holiday to all my coursemates:)

2355

4th Floor's Diwali Dinner.

*serving time..come and get your food,people:)*

*omg,winter is here..it's all snowy!!*

1st November'09@1326

I'm so the TIRED! but I just can't seem to get myself under the blanket yesterday.Every single muscle is fatigued after the long hours and cumulative effect of cooking each saturday ever since 17th october.Sevvanthee still teases me "You said,'why diwali only for 1 day?'" whenever I tell her "can i have a quiet weekend this week?"..I'm not this cooking material type and that's actual cause of all these.However,for my friends and fellow groupmates,I find a sense of satisfaction to invite them over for our indian dinner on our 4th floor each year.

Yesterday Morning woke up around 8am,and we started preparing our dishes.Since we had to cook for about 80 of our friends,the 5 of us,:Me,Sevvanthee,Maalini,Kiran and Jonas actually sped up the whole cooking process and by 2pm we were done with : Veg Kurma,Chicken masak merah,yellow-spiced rice(eh,such combo exist?),mix veg and drinks.I had to boil numerous times hot water,filter them then store them in big containers so we can make our best misture of sweet drink from the cordial which we had purchased from magnit.Everyone was like.."wht's this drink called?" Jonas and I winked and said "it's a good blend of everything..it's our secret"..(ha-ha)..

It just feels like we started our first year here and soon there'll be our last diwali dinner here.I know I will be missing all these funs once I graduate.Dad will say :"enjoy every single moments now,these are the moments which are very precious,best and important moments"..when did I ever go against daddy's words right?So I enjoyed it though at the beginning of the day and on friday I was lil bit down.Why?I will get back to that later.Now let me done with my final diwali dinner story for the year.

Jonas made the situation in kitchen very lively.Though only 2 boys helping me,sevvanthee and maalini,there weren't any glitches...Jonas being the youngest among us,was looking out the window,admiring the puppies which were out in the cold,snowy weather when he gets tired of stirring the veg kurma.With his non-fluent tamil,he made all of us broke into laughters whenever he makes an attempt to talk in tamil.

Kiran as usual the one who runs here and there to get things done.He definitely cooks better than I do,can estimate well for how many people it will be adequate and etc.After all ,serving in temple does come handy at times,I believe.What tickled the rest of us was when he tried to mix the full-filled container ,(ha-ha) the way he shook the container..too bad I didn;t take a snap of him doing so...

Here comes the experts in cooking(no I'm not included in that category)..sevvanthee and maalini.Colour of the dishes definitely changed..for example,Kurma colour became more like red-spiced up colour because of the excessive tomato paste,then the chicken apparently was okay but it was damn tasty..the mix veg + bolied dhal became like Dhal..aihhhss,nevertheless everyone seemed to enjoy and complementing happily that they had a great time and really loved the foods.Now,I'm really adamant that we especially me here have a hidden talent for cooking,just that I cared less in trying and making a decent multiple means everyday for myself:p

Somehow,I felt very less people turned out for our dinner since few were not feeling well,away to Ashan and attended the halloween party in another hostel.For those who didn;t attend our dinner yesterdat,all I can say is "YOU GUYS JUST MISSED A BON APPETITE OF INDIAN FOODS.."

I know Indian foods are all about the spices and being hot.Abdalla,Jeff,Jia Lynn were fanning their tongues..ermm,I have a low threshold for spicy food as I don;t consume much also,but i think yesterday was less spicy than any other Indian foods that we had cooked previously..but still you can see my buddies gulping down juice impatiently..get used to it guys,Indian food,what you guys expect?..

Anyways,it's my pleasure to have all of you here with me,thank you for your attendances.

xoxoxoxo.

1400